Karoli Kayirango,
genocidaire
I am guilty.
What I did was evil.
I have been a bad man.
Those who I have killed have relatives.
The moment I meet them
I will ask for forgiveness.
Anonymous,
AIDS infected due to rape
The sleepless nights
when I can't stop thinking
about what happened.
What they did to me.
Sometimes it can be a week without sleep.
I just can't forget.
When I am alone I can drive myself mad
the feelings of isolation and abandonment.
So maybe I meet people, talk, even laugh.
It's gone for a few hours.
Then the flashbacks come
It is like watching a film.
It all happens again.
Godance Mukankusi,
widow
In 1994 they killed my husband
and my children.
They destroyed my house.
I hid in the mountains to survive.
It was very hard.
But I am happy now.
A new house was built.
There is a group of orphans
who live nearby.
I look after them.
Alfrodis Kagaba,
human rights activist
The young people of today
are our politicians, judges, and police of tomorrow.
If we do not successfully educate the current generation
to respect the fundamental human rights
of every Rwandan then we will repeat
the horrors of the past.
We are making progress
but there is a great deal of work that must still be done.
Romaia Nagoga,
caretaker, Nyamata Church
Sometimes I'm in this room
where they killed the kids
by smashing them against the wall.
Shivers run through my entire body.
I'm thinking
about the children who were killed.
I imagine that I could have been killed with them.
I have this feeling that the murdered kids
are about to return from the dead.
I run away
and won't return for hours.
Hon. Fred Murindwa,
judge
Without justice there can be no reconciliation.
If an innocent man is wrongly condemned
the cycle of violence will not end.
The judicial system has kept our society together,
has kept it from boiling over.
To judge these cases during the month of April is very hard.
Apollinarie Mukansigaye,
social worker
We are trying to re-integrate the traumatized,
the marginalized, peoples into mainstream Rwanda.
All this is very hard on me.
Every day I am told of these experiences,
these horrors.
It is rewarding work but it is not easy.
Jan Damascene Kagabo,
Gacaca Court Sector president
We are using the traditional way.
It creates harmony in the communities.
Bring the accused and their victims together.
Face to face.
When this is not possible there might be relatives.
We must all live together now.
But justice must also be served.
Perpeture Mujawamariya,
former army officer
After the start of the war
I realized that the slogan that we had been given was a lie.
If these slogans had any weight
these things would not be happening.
I started to realize the government was deceiving us.
I lost confidence in my government.
I lost confidence in my senior officers.
These people made my army lose its dignity.
Emmanuel Murangira,
survivor
These rooms were filled with the dead.
50,000 killed in this place.
The killers enjoyed themselves.
I am one of 4 survivors.
My entire family was murdered.
I was shot.
Later that night I regained consciousness Ð
I was under a pile of bodies.
I visit sometimes
because I feel more comfortable
being among the dead
than the living.
Aimable Sibomana,
radio journalist
I regret the things I had to say.
It was just because
of the system,
where I was
in the system.
I would have been killed
if I had refused.
Bertide Hukamgormwa,
widow
They first attacked my son.
They cut off his penis,
forced it into his mouth.
They killed my children.
They made me watch.
I can't forgive.
I will never know happiness again.
Irene Uwanyirigira,
orphan and guardian
I keep busy
to forget the past.
But then I think about my brother and sisters'
future
and all my responsibilities.
I get overwhelmed.
The memories return.
I think about Mother and Father
and what happened to them.
I think of the past.
I refuse to run away
from my responsibilities.
But these problems
are just too big
for me to solve.
Life has been unjust to me.
Gaspard Rwamulinda,
genocidaire
The radio was telling us to do it.
So were the leaders.
Our Mayor was very clear.
He directed us.
I killed eight people.
I killed people I knew did not deserve to die.
It was that simple.
Elisabith Mucagu,
returned refugee, first day in Rwanda
I left Rwanda when I was very young.
I do not remember the land where I was born.
In Congo my children ate when I worked.
If I did not work they did not eat.
I have returned to work my own land.
My kids will have a better life,
they will not go hungry.
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Rwanda Testimonies by Adam Nadel
Exhibit opening December 16, 2003
The Gallery, Ken Horowitz Photographic services
601 West 26th Street, 17 Floor, New York City.
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